Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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