Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
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