my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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