I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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