I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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