i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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