I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
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