I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize