you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
