I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
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