The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
