I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Randomize
