I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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