shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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