just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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