we have officially lost it.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
