Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize