I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
he's single and there are thong briefs.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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