he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
