You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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