I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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