A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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