Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Blood and glitter go together right?
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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