I'm drive I can fine osifer
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize