yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
