What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
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