The maid of honor just puked.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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