If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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