Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
