That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
