when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
