Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
