First date: that requires underwear, huh?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
