Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
My pussy is not your playground.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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