As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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