we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize
