I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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