I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
