i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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