Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
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ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
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Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?