the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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