fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
