thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
