Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
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