She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
