she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
