brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
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