why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
When are your genitals available?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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