I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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