I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Someone came in the potted fern
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
